The Funnel Junkies Official
Track 7

Where’s My Traffic

Crossing the Stage
About this track

You built the funnel. You nailed the hook. The offer cooks. And then the stats sit there like a flatline. Where’s My Traffic is the refresh-in-your-sleep spiral — equal parts panic and punchline — for the builder who did everything “right” and still got silence.

For the day your dashboard personally offended you.
For anyone who has ever whispered, “did I forget to hit publish?”
If you are in the traffic drought, you are not alone.
Player Where’s My Traffic
Crossing the Stage cover
Lyrics
[Verse 1] Do you have the time to hear me lose my mind About my funnel that should be working just fine? I wrote every hook, The offer really cooks, The copy’s dialed in— So where’s the buyers?! [Pre-Chorus] Sometimes I check the stats and weep, Sometimes I refresh in my sleep! It all keeps adding up— I think I messed this up! Am I just a fraud? Or did I get scammed?! [Verse 2] I went to my coach, He said, “Just spend some more.” But my ad account’s already on the floor! I tried SEO, But Google hates me so… And now I’m drowning in some guru’s course! [Pre-Chorus] Sometimes I check the stats and weep, Sometimes I refresh in my sleep! It all keeps adding up— I think I messed this up! Am I just a fraud? Or did I get scammed?! [Bridge] Funnels are supposed to work! Where’s my traffic? Did I forget to hit "Publish" first?! Where’s my traffic?! Russell said this was the way! WHERE’S MY TRAFFIC?! Now I’m crying into my latte! [Final Chorus] Sometimes I check the stats and weep, Sometimes I refresh in my sleep! It all keeps adding up— I think I messed this up! Am I just a fraud? Or did I get scammed?! [Outro] Just one click away, they say… WHERE’S MY TRAFFIC?!!